End of the Journey

Thoughts on December's prompt, 'The Great Wheel'. 

At the beginning of this year, i got myself a book on astrological archetypes,
In which the journey of the hero was mentioned, too -
Which is the journey of the sun, that the zodiac resembles,
And also, kind of, the cycle of the moon,
So in the end: The Great Wheel again?

In this wheel, all the zodiac signs represent a certain stage or event of the hero‘s journey.
The horoscope begins at spring equinox - with Aries. It’s the beginning of the circle, the birth of
the hero.
I am born in Pisces.
The last sign in the order, the end of the wheel.
So one could say, this is ‚my season‘. (If you follow the zodiac)

I don’t really like the cold, though.
And i am seriously afraid of death. Of losing someone dear to me.
Of endings.

I’m not good at letting go, either.
And every now and then changes appear in my life, that scare me.

So I don’t know... if this is really my season.

I enjoy Christmas Eve a lot, as we always spend it with the whole family.
It is one of the days sacred to me.

I like staying inside in my cosy sweaters, having some hot tea and a nice book - or something to
write on.
And i like the snow. (If it comes)
But else...

At the end of the year i mostly just see the time that has passed, the goals I haven’t reached,
the fact that i am getting older, which scares me, too.

I am still a Pisces, and there a many attributes of that sign, that i can connect with.
But i still have to find out, what being at this end of the cycle means to me,
What might be in there for me.

The solar cycle is a story of death and rebirth.

And as much as i love spring, love to see new life grow and the flowers bloom,
I tend to be so terrified of death that, in that moment,
the hope of rebirth cannot reach my heart.
I‘m so afraid of endings, I cannot see the chance of a new beginning.

Maybe, this could become my new year‘s resolution,
To look death in the eye
And try to see the new life behind it
From time to time

To be a little less afraid
And a little more hopeful
Thea, Germany.